Best Cities For Singles

This article was written by Aemilia Madden and originally published onPOPSUGAR Love & Sex.


Young, single, and ready to mingle? We’ll admit that life as a single person isn’t always a walk in the park, but living in certain cities can help make the most out of solo life. Whether you love a fancy restaurant, dig a funky bar crawl, or are simply looking for somewhere safe to lay your head, these cities have it all. and Onboard Informatics collected data that covers everything from average income to coffee-shop density to determine the top 10 spots for all the single ladies and gentlemen.

Each category marked with * is scored on a scale from 1-1,000 (1,000 being the top score), here’s the breakdown of what each one means to you:

  • Safety Index: based on the total crime risk for each city.
  • Lifestyle-Trend Focus Index: based on the percentage of people who enjoy going out dancing, drinking, clubbing, and attending concerts and performances.
  • Nightlife Options Index: based on the number and density of bars, clubs, pubs, and other nighttime establishments in each city.
  • Restaurant Options Index: based on the number and density of restaurants in or near each city.
  • Frequent Restaurant-Goers Index: based on the percentage of the population regularly going out to eat.
  • Frequent Coffee-Shop-Goers Index: based on the availability of coffee shops.

Are you ready to see how each city stacks up? Starting with the best city for singles . . .

Full Article

7 networking tactics to meet more dates

Looking to amp up your love life? Then it’s time to expand your social circle. Why? Basically, it’s the law of probabilities. The more people you know, the more you’ll mingle, and the more likely you are to meet The One (or at least someone fun to date).

But how exactly does one go about shifting gears from homebody to too-popular-to-stay-at-home? To answer that question, we culled advice from dating and networking experts on some fabulous ways to meet, greet and get out there! Read on for their simple strategies below…

Tactic #1: Join a same-sex social group
“Join a networking or social group or a sports team that isn’t coed,” suggests relationship expert and “Love Coach” Rinatta Paries of Vancouver, WA. Why the same-sex connection? Well, women and men know men and women whom they are not dating but who may be great for you to date. “Once you create new social friendships, the people in your group will be happy to set you up on many dates with other people they know,” says Paries. “It may be a sibling, cousin, neighbor, a business associate or someone else they run across who immediately makes them think of you.” In other words, making new same-sex friends can lead to love connections you would never have made otherwise.

Tactic #2: Keep business cards handy
How many times have you met someone nice in an unexpected place but had no easy way to suggest connecting again? It happens! And then later you kick yourself for not just saying, “Hey, should we get a coffee sometime or something?” Here’s a really easy solution to avoid those missed social opportunities. If you’re looking to meet your potential match, always, always, always keep a business/contact card with you (in your pocket, purse, wallet, or whatever). “I’ve met interesting people while waiting at the vet’s office,” says networking expert Ronna Lichtenberg, author of Pitch Like a Girl: Get Respect, Get Noticed, Get What You Want. “You never know… you could end up meeting Mr. or Ms. Right over a possible pet adoption!” Feel uneasy about giving out a card with all your private info to strangers? Print a version with just your first name and an email address. You’ll find that whipping out a card is a lot easier way to make a connection than suggesting you exchange numbers while fumbling for a pen and an old receipt to scribble the digits on.

Full Article

Best Dating Advice

Dating can be tough but it doesn’t have to be. Sometimes your friends and family aren’t the best with advice. So here is some dating advice to at least just think about.

1) Have self confidence. This is the most important one. It’s been said many time but it is true love yourself before anyone can love you.

2) Don’t over analyze. As girls we tend to read into too much. Stop. Reading into too much will cause unnecessary drama and will lead to being single once again.

3) Take things slow. Don’t sleep on the first date because you come off as easy. Get to know each other and build a foundation. Being friends with someone is the best way to start a relationship.

4) Think about what you want in someone but don’t have certain expectations. We all have desires what we want in someone but sometimes we focus only on that and we could end up missing out on someone really wonderful.

Dating is all about having fun and meeting the person who is perfect for you. Sometimes you have to go through different guys to meet the one who is for you. Just be yourself. It is hard but when someone loves you they love you no matter what.

Check Out Video

The Rules of Texting

Texting is a key part of the today’s courtship. We figured we would talk to some women about some of the right ways and wrong ways to handle this part of the dance. Pay close attention. This could be the difference between a second date and a complete shutdown.

Check out this nice video put together by

Full Article

5 social media mistakes that mess with your career

One wrong tweet, and you could lose more than just a few followers–you could lose your job. In March, two developers were fired after one of them took to Twitter to complain about sexist jokes that the other had made at a tech conference. The male developer was fired because of his comments, and the female developer appeared to be laid off due to the harsh backlash she and her company received in response to her tweets.

Whether these employees should have been let go is debatable, but the incident is a good reminder that companies are keeping tabs on what you post online–and they can punish you for it. “Social media is not trivial anymore,” says Miriam Salpeter, author of Social Networking for Career Success. “We have to realize that even though something may seem like a throwaway comment, people are listening.”
So how can you make sure that your social networking habits aren’t screwing with your career? Start by avoiding these major mistakes:
Mistake #1: You don’t know your company’s policy
More businesses are adding social media stipulations to their employee handbooks, says Mike Haberman, human resources consultant for Omega HR Solutions. So now might be a good time to actually read all that paperwork you received when you were hired. Even if your employee handbook doesn’t specify that you could be terminated for a rogue Facebook post, that doesn’t mean you’re off the hook. Companies will often find a way to fire someone if they feel it’s necessary, says Salpeter. Most workers are employees at will, which means they can be fired at any time, for any reason, she says. So it’s crucial to know what might get you in trouble before you do it. If that’s not outlined in the handbook, schedule a meeting with HR ASAP to find out what the policy is.
Mistake #2: You stir up controversy
Advertising your political or religious beliefs on Facebook and Twitter is practically the norm these days, but these types of posts can backfire at work, warns Salpeter. After all, if something seems offensive to your HR department, it could result in a reprimand or even a termination. And it’s not just the usual hot-button topics you have to worry about. Even something that you don’t automatically view as controversial–like following Chris Brown on Twitter or posting about sexual health rights–can affect someone’s perception of you. And when that person has the power to fire you, you definitely don’t want to come off as offensive to them.
Mistake #3: You’re overly negative online
You wouldn’t go around the office ranting and complaining all day, so don’t do it online, either. HR may see a string of rude or angry comments as a red flag–whether they’re work-related or not. “You’re demonstrating your temperament and your attitude,” says Salpeter. So keep the hate-tweets and humblebrags to a minimum, especially when you’re applying for a job.

Why On-Again, Off-Again Relationships Are Destined to Fail

Joey and Pacey, Rachel and Ross, and Carrie and Mr. Big all had relationships in which they broke up and eventually got back together. While it looks romantic on TV, a new study suggests that these types of on-again, off-again cyclical relationships don’t have Disney endings.

A 2012 study from Kansas State University discovered that couples in cyclical relationships have weaker bonds than those who have stayed together (noncyclical). Couples were shown to be far more impulsive once they got back together — especially on big decisions like moving in together or having kids.

Overall, cyclical couples were less satisfied with each other, had worse communication, lower levels of self-esteem, and more doubt as to the lasting power of their relationship.

Surely, some couples break up and through a healthy process, realize that they lost something great and get back together. But what’s likely closer to reality is that couples break up for a good reason, hate returning to the single life, miss the comfort they had, and reconcile simply to avoid the anguish.

If you’re planning to get back together, make sure the reunion is carefully considered and you’re not just going back to a consolation prize. Those relationships don’t last.

Three questions to answer before you break up

At the first sign of relationship trouble, do you have the urge to run for the hills? Have you hit the “eject” button on a romance — but later regretted it? Perhaps you are, then, what experts refer to as a “bolter.” While the instinct to bail on a relationship during in its early stages can often be a healthy one, it also could signal that you haven’t yet developed all the necessary skills for getting your romantic needs met. So how does one sort out the difference between having a healthy impulse to end things versus knowing when it’s time to turn towards your new love and work on improving your relationship together? We took that question to leading relationship experts Dr. John Gottman and Katherine Woodward Thomas, who gave us some very compelling answers.

Why do some of us have such a strong tendency to run away from conflict?
Katherine Woodward Thomas, licensed psychotherapist and author of the best-selling book Calling in “The One”: 7 Weeks to Attract the Love of Your Life, points out that feeling the desire to bolt is often born out of old survival strategies from one’s earliest experiences. “The people who tend to bolt are the ones who fundamentally lack a deep sense of safety, and it’s probably a justified feeling that came from something they experienced long ago,” explains Woodward Thomas. “They learned how to create walls in order to survive instead of learning how to negotiate boundaries, because maybe people in their homes weren’t reasonable enough to negotiate those boundaries early on.”

Woodward Thomas suggests that the absence of conflict resolution skills (as well as not having the skills for getting one’s relationship needs met by a partner) can bring up the feeling of “I’ve got to get out of here” in some people. “Those of us who are most likely to bolt prematurely from relationships are also the ones who still surround ourselves with some pretty primitive defenses, such as minimizing our own needs and placing our full attention on another person,” says Woodward Thomas. “In that case, there’s almost no other way to solve the problems that occur in relationships. Without the ability to express your own needs and feelings and create some sense of mutuality and support in the relationship, the only way you can take care of yourself is to leave at some point.”

Full Article